Getting Sick

**As a warning, there are references in this blog about "getting sick"**

This last weekend Heather and I had the lovely "joy" of being home with two sick children. It was interesting to see how our kids differed when handling the "getting sick"part. We could tell that Chloe was "getting sick" because of what she was doing before hand. We would be able to run and set up before the event was about to begin. Yet, in all our effort, we could not tell when Eli was going to "get sick" because it was spontaneously brought on without any control. It was as sporadic as binary code to someone who has no training in that field. We felt awful for both of them, but with Eli, it was most frustrating because there was no predictability. It just happened.

What if we understood sin as "getting sick"? Would that change how we view sin? Would I feel compelled to no longer sin, if indeed, I did view it as a "sickness"? Can you place yourself in Eli or Chloe's shoes if we replaced "getting sick" with "sinning" or "get sick" with "sin". Like sin, their sickness effected every aspect of life, regular habits, relationships (lots of strain on mom and dad), eating... everything.

I wonder what we would do if we understood our sins to be a form of sickness that we CHOOSE. How would we change our thinking... or would we? Or maybe our sin is like a cancer, eating us up and we don't even know it. Perhaps we could all use some self-evaluation and figure out where we stand.

Isaiah 27

We can see all over Scripture the concept of gardening and how it relates to our spiritual life. There is the farmer that spreads the seeds on the different soils. There is the concept of the Vine and branches. There's the one about weeds are like sin and you have to pull out the root in order to get rid of sin. Most of us have hear these more than once. But I found while reading through Isaiah, another one... and this one stuck with me. Maybe because it was new and I haven't heard it for the billionth time this decade. I don't know, but take a look-see.

Isaiah 27:2-5

At that same time, a fine vineyard will appear.
There's something to sing about!
I, God, tend it.
I keep it well-watered.
I keep careful watch over it
so that no one can damage it.
I'm not angry. I care.
Even if it gives me thistles and thornbushes,
I'll just pull them out
and burn them up.
Let that vine cling to me for safety,
let it find a good and whole life with me,
let it hold on for a good and whole life."

The concept I'm pulling from here is a familiar one, but from a different angle perhaps. This is applying the concept found in the passage, so I'm not equating Israel and the Church, but I do find this interesting.

God, again, is the farmer. We, again, are the garden, and in this case, the vineyard. What I am seeing from another angle is the helplessness of garden. If a farmer does not pull the weeds from his garden, it will soon be overrun. It's funny that this is brought up the day after I spent a good hour or two pulling weeds at the school. There are weeds that have thorns. Weeds that cover a wide space of ground. And there are weeds that are sticky and leave gooey stuff on your hands. It wasn't a garden, but none the less, there were massive amounts of weeds being pulled. The ground that is being worked with is at the mercy of the person in charge of it. My yard and landscape are at the mercy of my power to pull those weeds (and in some cases weedwack).

The parallel lies in the idea that we are at the mercy of our God. We truly can control nothing (as much as we think we control the things around us, we don't know the plans of God). God as the farmer, can choose to let us go to the weeds or He can choose to fight for us. And He chooses to FIGHT FOR US. Isaiah says, "I keep careful watch over it so that no one can damage it." God is in complete control. Watching over us. Making sure that we are able to grow into the person He desires us to become.

Let us understand, we are helpless. Unable to save ourselves from the detestable sins we commit every day of every month of every year. We have no ability to reach our full potential without the permission of the farmer. Only the farmer determines if and when the weeds are going to be pulled. But look at what the verses say: "Let the vine cling to me for safety, let it find a good and whole life with me, let it hold on for a good and whole life."

If we want to live a whole and good life, I suggest that we cling to God, our Lord and Savior. This is the way we must choose... "Clinging to HIM for safety."

Isaiah 1-5 Reflections

I've decided to go through Isaiah before school resumes again. I've done this once about 6 or 7 years ago (go through Isaiah). Even though I have only gone through chapter 5, I see a pattern already set by Israel and God. God is immutable (never changing), therefore His justice is the same. Therefore His love remains. Therefore His mercy remains.

Israel on the other hand, shows a tendency to flip-flop between right and wrong, good and evil. In fact, Isaiah even says that they make what is good, evil and what is evil, good. Taking it to a level above that, Israel does things they don't even mean. Hypocritical if you will... a phrase over used, but still drives the point in Christian circles "going through the motions". In fact, God says to them "I'm sick of your religious ways" (paraphrased, but can be shown again in Malachi). This was the point that struck a nerve with me.

I began to ask myself... Am I religious? Am I hypocritical? Do I "walk through the motions"?

Every Sunday... yes, I am religious. Random points through out the day... yes, I am hypocritical. And yes... gosh darn it! I walk through the motions. Even if as I dread saying this, I have come to the conclusion that I preach and do not practice.

And I hate it when people ask me "what do you do for a living?" because I always feel quite guilty, even if I haven't done anything wrong. Maybe it's because I become prideful or maybe I feel it's a reality checker... oh, yeah- that thing I just said, ruined this opportunity for Jesus.

However, with all that said, my challenge to myself still lies. As I sat in Sunday School and listened to my teacher, he presented the question "Why do we not write our covenants or promises down that are directed at God, but do with bills, mortgages, loans, and the like?" His answer, "Because we do not find them to be as important or binding if we don't write it down." So here it is.... the big challenge to myself... the covenants I am attempting to make:

I, Jason Swinehart, am willing to make a covenant to God to do the following:

1. TO TAKE READING GOD'S WORD AS SERIOUSLY AS I TEACH IT IS.
2. TO BRING ALL MATTERS TO GOD IN PRAYER.
3. TO NOT BE RELIGIOUS IN THE TWO PREVIOUS BEFORE THIS.

That's it. I might tackle more later, but right now... I want to specifically make time to put Christ first in my life.

Living Spirit Led

I received a free reading of Francis Chan's Forgotten God (which by the way is still free for the next few days of June). I've listened to it almost 3 times and quite frankly, I find myself moved by it every time... and every time, moved slightly different.

Right now, I'm constantly reviewing myself and wondering "Have I given myself fully to God?" Francis Chan hits a note that is very hard to take. He asks that very question, and then continues on to say that we as Christians have not because of the fear that is associated with it.

Here are my answers to this very question:

Why do I not give myself fully to God?

1. I don't want to live on a foreign field.
2. I am comfortable (too a certain extent) of where I am at
3. I am scared to death of danger (I have been one who has feared getting in trouble, hurt, and other things)
4. I fear persecution (not our "western thinking" of persecution, but real, physical persecution... I am a wimp)
5. I fear death (it's not necessarily a fear of where I'm going to go, but more of the unknown that will occur when I die)
   
6. I won't get to do what I want to do (surrendering of rights)
7. I won't be creating a future for my children.
   

I know some of these may seem shallow, and yet some of them are legitimate fears and desires. However, if I was totally sold out for Jesus... If I totally wanted to live a life that was "Spirit-filled".... If I wanted to glorify God in every aspect of my life... Would I not "push on for the prize?" I sometimes wonder if I'm called to do more than I am already... husband, father, teacher, neighbor, friend, helper, son, nephew, brother. Is there more at work for me? Or am I doing what is desired of me now? I often struggle with this concept because I'm not in a hut or wearing clothes from the 70's or being pursued by someone who wants to kill me.

Honestly, I don't know. But what I do know is that I want to succumb to the will of the Spirit. I desire to be Spirit-led and Spirit-filled, even if that means I have to live in a hut.